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An Ounce of Panic is Worth a Quintal of Surveillance!

May 26, 2009

Panic

Did you know terrorists are running amok in Delhi University??

Spreading philosophy, pornography, germs, viruses and worse!! What is the government doing??

Never fear! The wheels of justice are grinding ever closer, to a halt. The Delhi Police have installed surveillance cameras at sites of strategic importance, to catch these mad killers in the act!
In collaboration with the Delhi Police [With you, For you, Always] intrepid investigators from the Kafila Anti-terrorism Squad [KATS: With You, For You, Always-Already] have been on the prowl. And our surveillance cameras have found terrorists under surveillance cameras everywhere!

AT: Morris Nagar Chowk!
AT: Patel Chest!
AT: D.U.S.U. Office!
AT: Hindu College-Ramjas College crossing!

And how did they get here? On the Metro.

Delhi University is under attack! Sleeper cells are standing!
Plots are being hatched!
Subversives are being dispatched!
How will they be catched??
[err..caught…]

When snakes nest in the garden of eden only the bitter fruit of knowledge can smoke them out!

Morris Nagar, Delhi University Campus

Morris Nagar, Delhi University Campus

We know who they are, and more importantly we know where they are (under the cameras i.e.)…Doing exactly what we have been warned about. Thank god for the cameras. Without them dark, nefarious, secret deeds would never see the harsh light of day! Be Inert! Sorry…Alert! Stay Awake! Constant Vigilance!

Morris Nagar, Delhi University Campus

Terrorist reading subersive literature: Morris Nagar, Delhi University Campus


Patel Chest, Delhi University Campus

Terrorist deploying chemical weapon: Patel Chest, Delhi University Campus

Hindu-Ramjas Crossing, Delhi University Campus

Terrorist making biological weapon: Hindu-Ramjas Crossing, Delhi University Campus

Watch out all you students and subversives, naxals and neurotics, communists and cabbalists, paedophiles and perverts, teetotalers and terrorists, homosexuals and hornblowers, vegetarians, dipsomaniacs, insomniacs, foot-fetishists – we’re onto you!
Eternally in your service in the War against Error
K.A.T.S

12 Comments leave one →
  1. May 26, 2009 2:48 AM

    V for vendetta and K for Kafila.
    Excellent work Aarti. Police is always ready to catch more Binayek sen to carry on good work of defending people against crime and terror.

  2. Nivedita Menon permalink*
    May 26, 2009 10:35 AM

    BE ALERT!
    THIS COUNTRY NEEDS LERTS!!

  3. Nivedita Menon permalink*
    May 26, 2009 10:42 AM

    PS I remembered this sticker from Mad Magazine in the ’80′s (1980′s, that is), and being a conscientious academic type, just googled to see if I could find the exact reference. I couldn’t, but I did come across this line of conversation on the slogan, the earnestness of which brought the tears to my eyes, as did our KATS commando’s courageous life-risking expose of terroristic activities in and around my alma mater…
    “Be alert – your country needs lerts – what’s so special about this saying?”

  4. Anubha permalink
    May 29, 2009 2:25 AM

    It will not be surprising to know that it is not only Delhi University but almost the entire city which is being stealthily wired into a hub that could have serious repercussions. It is amazing that the media which cares to cover almost every waking moment of celebrities has still not zoomed into the secrets of this camera mongering. I wonder where are these pictures being fed into and what is the rationale behind them. the last thing we need now is an overarching recon. almost reminds me of conspiracy and scary movies off the hollywood block. no wonder all of us we may well be turning into potential terrorists.

  5. Devika permalink
    May 29, 2009 1:04 PM

    Ha! You should just see the cc tvs fitted around ‘coaching centres’ in Kerala. These are places where high school students are sent to be ‘coached’ for entrance exams. These are mini-concentration camps where human rights violations are justified in the name of hard work and future success… Teenagers in Kerala suffer the worst kinds of rights violations, but they are of course by no way passive. In these places, you are monitored as you study and apparently in some places, you will fined if caught talking with or smiling at other students.. But some of the smart ones know how to disable the cameras and jump the walls too…

  6. Akhil Katyal permalink
    June 10, 2009 1:58 PM

    hahahahaha :)

  7. Sunalini permalink
    June 19, 2009 9:33 AM

    There are cameras now inside D.U colleges too, mostly at the gates. There was a proposal to install cameras inside classrooms too, to keep an eye on those lazy (!) teachers, but that has been opposed in most colleges. Interestingly, these proposals came up in the wake of the Mumbai attacks, but actually they tie in with new proposals by the University Grants Commission to make promotions of college lecturers dependent on performance. So the number of hours you spend talking inside a classroom, measured by a recording device, is an indication of your dedication and quantifiable performance. Talk about the terrorism of teaching quantification…great work, Aarti!!

  8. June 29, 2009 3:27 PM

    in response to ever-mushrooming surveillance camras: I wonder what they do with all that digital footage? What kind of shelf-life does it have? When do they decide it’s old enough to delete? do they delete it? It’s ludicrous that such junk should be allowed to pile up while precious records and traces of the past are left free to perish rapidly in the National Archives of India. (or the AIR archives which are in a complete mess).

    on another note Who decides where the cameras should be placed and on what basis? How do I know the person watching me isn’t a perv? I’d like to know more about the ‘watchers’ and how they see themselves.

    a follow up soon?

  9. July 25, 2009 2:38 AM

    Aarti i am speechless with admiration.

  10. jasmeen permalink
    July 25, 2009 2:42 PM

    love it!

  11. Aarti Sethi permalink*
    July 28, 2009 4:02 PM

    Thank you all :) Glad you enjoyed the K.A.T.S expose. Interestingly the cameras were installed during the summer vacations when university is closed and no one is around to keep track of whats going on. By the time it opened on the 15th of July, it was too late for anyone to raise any questions. Fait accompli.

    Recently, Himanshu Sabarwal’s (the son of Professor Sabarwal who was killed by ABVP goons) accountant was murdered in Delhi University. It seems the police is reviewing the camera footage. Obviously the cameras will reveal nothing, because the incidents do not occur within the line of sight of the seeing machines. Which will obviously mean, by the twisted logic of the surveillance state, that we need even more cameras…

    Methinks a follow-up is needed soon. I will contact the K.A.T.S commandos.

    • Prithvi permalink
      July 29, 2009 6:47 PM

      Well done Aarti, proud of you :)

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